It's hard to focus when you're on vacation

We thought we'd give you some time to adequately anticipate this post. I am currently sitting in our room at The Clip while Jess is enjoying the last few minutes of vacay on the beach. I got a secret sunburn* and am forced to sit inside eating the remaining sour worms while watching reality forensic shows. Ok, the updates:

Tuesday night:

Faced with the disappointment that our new high-end handbags did not match our outfits, we each settled for a bag from the sixteen that Jess brought and we on our way. Our Tuesday night mission was to drink one of those buckets of Corona that you see on MTV Spring Break videos. We easily found an establishment with these delicious little bundles and settled in for a cool beer. Two drinks in we were tired of the horrible cover bands and counting the interracial couples who were passing by. Note to the reader: Fort Lauderdale is a haven for interracial love. All sorts of races mixing right together here. I sent Castro a text to let him know, but I think it was lost in translation. I'm pretty sure he thought that Jess and I were running races. I digress. We asked our very helpful and blinged-up server if she knew where the locals hang out and we were off to Riverfront. There was some concern on our end when our cab driver passed Riverfront, but we soon realized that he was taking us to the real heart of 20-something living in the Fort. We sat down at a nice little outdoor table and were greeted with half-off happy hour! I had a couple "Anne Penningtons"-- (translation- Bacardi and Diet) and Jess enjoyed a couple vodka tonics. If you've been counting, this is four drinks for each of us. If you know Jess at all, you'll not be surprised that she later rocked climbed on a hotel wall on our way home. Our new server let us know there is a 2 for 1 taco deal next door and that was all it took for us to give up the half-priced happy hour for half-priced tacos. Immediately upon entering the taco establishment I noted that the bartender was clearly Latino. I'll admit that I made a generalization and said that I thought he probably spoke Spanish. To save you the trouble of going back to our vacation objectives, I'll remind you that speaking Spanish is one of our objectives. Opportunity knocks. Within moments he let us know that he is bilingual because he is Latino. Jess was amazed not only by my language proficiency, but also with my natural ability to identify Latino men given the depth of my experience is solemente Dominicano. We were engaged in brief conversation with a man stating he was from the KGB. In reality he drives a rickshaw. BUT next to that man was a man drinking a lager. Like a regular ol' Yuengling Lager! Turns out he's from Philly and just moved to the Fort! Well if that didn't make us feel like we were at home I don't know what would. We enjoyed our Grouper tacos (Jess has only called this particular fish groper) and had a nice conversation with.... you guessed it... Phillipe! He was kind enough to walk us part of the way home as well as share a cab with us. We're happy to report that we officially have a new best friend in Fort Lauderdale. I expect that Phillipe will be scouting out good bakeries so that the next time we visit we'll be able to eat some delicious pound cakes. That's important on vacation.

Wednesday:

There's not much to say about Wednesday. We laid on the beach or by the pool the entire day and went out to (finally!) a delicious dinner. We were in bed by 10. OH WAIT! Wednesday was the day the Jessika made her life choice! A life choice is best described by the person who made it. Here is what Jess has to say, "Life choices are best made on the beach. After much internal debate and counseling from various people, I've decided to stay in Philadelphia although all of my ex-boyfriends live there. That's about it. Should I say what I'm doing? I'm going to go be a Dean in Trenton and wear skirt suits everyday. My quest for love also is a quest for friends. When I said that I didn't have friends in Philadelphia, Kimberly was offended. I'm a little worried because I did just get an awesome match from a 45 year old man in Harrisburg." For those of you who are wondering how she celebrated her life choice, Jessika ate sour worms. You may be wondering why we've not been talking much about match.com. Well, Jessika decided it's now too personal so we're no longer able to report on that subject. I also realize that there is one more major event of vacation that has never been mentioned. Jess had conjunctivitis on vacay. We remedied it with ointment so don't be concerned.

I started this blog in the hotel and am finishing it at the Fort Lauderdale airport. In a few short hours we'll be back in Philly and back to work. The most exciting part about that is being able to tell everyone what we did so we've really shot ourselves in the foot with this blog. If you're reading this now, rest assured that you'll also hear these details live within the next 24 hours.

Love and sour gummy candy,

Kimber and Jess

*secret sunburn mostly means that when we came in from the beach I bragged to my mom about having my first even tan ever. It later transformed into something resembling a hot-pink topographic map.

p.s. we'll also be posting more photos. we learned from match.com that posting photos drastically increases activity.